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Funny Amtgard Story

September 2, 2008

Funny story from the Amtgard week-end:

On Saturday, the organizers of the event decided to have a little cash grill. Nothing huge. Hamburgers, hotdogs, sodas, etc. Because I am a sucker, and I really like the lovely lady running it, and I was UTTERLY BORED, I volunteered to help out. Kim (AKA, the lovely Lady), had me at the window handling the money. Which was kind of cool, because I got to talk to everyone who came through. I don’t find it very easy to strike up conversation with strangers, so having a reason to talk to these people helped me feel more comfortable around them.

So there I am, serving up food, when this guy comes up to the counter. I take his order, and he says “Oh, and I was told to come see a girl named Fionna. I hear she’s really pretty.”

At this point, I realize I’m still wearing the name tags we put on for kid’s crafts. And it has my Amtgard name on it (It’s Fionna, for those running a little low on their caffine reserves). So I decide to run with it. I tell him I’ve heard of her too, that I hear she’s pretty nice, but that she has a tendency to hit people. We joke back and forth a bit, and then he leaves.

Later, I’m helping out with dinner, when the guy comes up again. This time, he wants to APOLOGIZE for flirting with me. I tell him it’s no big deal. He tries to apologize again, I tell him I wasn’t offended or anything, so really… no big deal. THEN, he says this “Yeah, I just didn’t know if you had a 6’6″, 400 pound boyfriend who was going to beat me up for hitting on you.”

So I turn around, and go “Honey, how tall are you again?”

Moose, who has been busily shuttling food back and forth to the grill stops long enough to say “6 foot,” and dashes off again.

I turn back to the guy, give him my sweetest smile and say “He’s only 6 feet. And he doesn’t beat up guys who flirt. He beats up guys who touch.”

Gotta tell ya… The look on this guy’s face was PRICELESS.

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